The Spanking Cure

According to Journal of the American Academy of Pediatrics, there is a link between spanking your children, “mood disorders, anxiety disorders, substance abuse/dependence, and personality disorder.”

Dr. Harvey Karp offered this advice in a Huffington post article:

Give your kid a time-out
Dr. Karp says he starts time-outs with children as young as 1 year old. Dr. McCarthy recommends that “the child should stay there for roughly one minute for every year of age,” adding that it’s critical to make sure your child remains isolated for the duration of the time-out. The point is to “disengage,” as Braun puts it. “If … you spend the whole time putting them back in [time-out], it ends up defeating the purpose,” Dr. McCarthy explains.

Give yourself a time-out
You may be feeling angry, but don’t rush into anything rash. “If you feel yourself getting to your boiling point (we all get there),” Dr. McCarthy says, “take a break. Put your child somewhere safe, and take a moment for yourself.” (Giving a child a time-out can kill two birds with one stone.) Then, as Braun writes: “When you have both come back to planet Earth, even as long as an hour later depending upon the age of the child (the younger the child, the shorter the time), do your revisit.”

Implement logical consequences
Logical consequences are exactly what they sound like — punishments “directly related to the misbehavior,” in Braun’s words. As Dr. Karp puts it: “If you’re teasing your sister with the G.I. Joe toy, the G.I. Joe toy’s going to disappear.” This punishment works best for younger kids; both Braun and Dr. McCarthy say it can be appropriate to give older children broader punishments, such as loss of privileges “or other favorite things, like Xboxes or cell phones.”

Say “no” — and mean it
As Dr. Karp says, screaming, yelling and hitting is “fundamentally a counterproductive and a disrespectful way of getting your point across.”

What are your methods for staying cool, positive parenting and disciplining your children?

Click her for additional Parenting ideas from Dr. Michele Borba.