You’re not a failure, it’s not your fault. Even if you and your partner have seen the best relationship coaches and marriage therapists. It’s not your fault that intimacy didn’t improve or it weaned off after a period of time. It’s tempting to point fingers or take the blame. It’s not because you are your partner didn’t try hard enough or didn’t care enough. There are, of course, exceptions. But even in those few exceptions, it had little or nothing to do with trying hard enough.

"The best way to avoid divorce from an unfaithful, abusive, or unsupportive spouse is to avoid marriage to such a person. If you wish to marry well, inquire well. Associations through 'hanging out' or exchanging information on the Internet are not a sufficient basis for marriage. There should be dating, followed by careful and thoughtful and thorough courtship. There should be ample opportunities to experience the prospective spouse’s behavior in a variety of circumstances" (Dallin H. Oaks, "Divorce," Ensign, May 2007, 70–73).